Jelly Baby goes 2 the Dr & says "Dr i've got aids" Dr replys "U cant have aids ur a jelly Baby" Jelly Baby says "yes but Dr i've been sleepin wiv ALLSORTS!
chicken and egg in bed,chicken has head on pillow smoking।Egg rolls over annoyed saying"i guess we answered that question"
A teacher ask"wot part of the body goes to heaven first?"A child replies"feet- coz every nite i c my mum with her feet in the air screamin GOD I'M COMIN!
Little Girl:"Mommy I just found out that the little boy next door has a penis like a peanut" Mommy:"u mean its small?"Little Girl:"No its salty"
an essex girl has a car crash and an ambulance arrives।the paramedic asks 'how many fingers have i got up?'the girl replies- oh no i think im paralised too
Tumko dekha to yeh khyaal aaya,Tumko dekha to yeh khyaal aaya,Ki Paaglo ke stock mein Naya Maal Aaya.
Zindagi mein hamesha SMART log milenge, kahi zyada to kahi kum milenge, choice zara sochke karna, zaroori nahi har jagah tumhe hum jaise milenge.
Machchar ne aapko kata wo uska JUNUN tha, aapne khujli ki wo aapka SUKUN tha, chahkar bhi aapne use nahi mara bcoz uski ragon mein bhi aapka hi KHOON tha.
A Doctor has come to see a patient. The patient has had major surgery to both of his hands. "doctor" says the men excitedly, "will i be able to play the piano when these bandages come off?"
"I don't see why not," replies the doctor.
"That's funny," says the man. "I wasn't able to play it before".
Teacher: You call your mother as mum. What'll you call your mother's younger sister and elder sister?
Kid: Mini mum and maxi mum!
Boss:I am giving you driver's job. Starting salary Rs 3000. Is it ok?
Driver: You are great sir! Starting salary is OK but how much is driving salary?
Santa gets a cheque and throws it on the ground. Can you guess why?
To see whether it will bounce or not!
A man looked in the mirror and said : seems i have seen him somewhere.
Then he says: Oh yes! He's the same idiot who was standing next to my wife in my wedding album.
What's an adult joke?
Santa: Any joke which is eighteen years old.