Sardar SMS Jokes - Page 1

• Two Sardarjis, both student of I.I.T, Kanpur, were talking about the American Astronauts.
  One said to the other, "What's the big deal about going to the moon-anybody can go to the moon. We are sardars we will go direct to the sun."
  "But if we get within 13 million miles from the sun, we'll melt."
  And the first answered, "So what, we'll go at night."
• Santa : I tried your number so many times, it always said 'Switched Off'!"
  Banta : Nahi Pape, it's my HELLO TUNE!
• Once, two Sardars were feeling bored and decided to play a few games of chess to ass the time.
  They were doing this for some time, when two more sardar friends
  dropped by. Seeing them play chess, they said -
  "Come on guys, we are feeling bored too. Let us play doubles!"
• The Sardarji Doctor to his patient:
  "It's very important that you take this medicine exactly 30 minutes before you feel the pain."
• GAMBLER Surjit Singh saw that his friend Baljit Singh was very depressed.
  "What happened ?" asked Surjit.
  "Yaar, I lost Rs. 1000 in a bet yesterday."
  "How come ?"
  "Well, yesterday, the one-day match between India and England was being shown live on TV. I bet Rs.500 that India would win, but I lost the bet."
  "But thats only Rs. 500, where did the rest go ?"
  "Yaar, I bet on the highlights too "
• Sardar & his wife buy coffee in a shop.
  Sardar says... Drink quickly..... .
  Wife asks why...
  sardar says hot coffee Rs5 and cold coffee Rs10
• Once a Sardarji went to the city of Mumbai for the first time to meet his father. His father had asked him to keep walking in the direction of the sunrise until he eventually reached hishouse. Since, the Sardarji was new to the city he decided to ask a passerby the direction in which the sun rose in Mumbai - east, west, north or south?The passerby who was also a Sardarji thought for some time and then said, "Main bhi is sheher mein naya aaya hoon!" ( I am also new in this city!)
• Santa standing on platform suddenly jumps on the railway track.
  Banta: Santa u'll die.
  Santa: U'll die bcoz haven't u heard train is coming on platform?
• A teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket
  match. All were busy writing except one Sardarji. He wrote "DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH!"
• Sardarji, tell me ...., what is the meaning of SMS ?
  Sardar angrily said, i know -
  it means....
  S - Sardaron ke
  M - Mazak udane ki
  S - Service
• Pappu, while filling up a form: Dad, what should I write against mother tongue.?
  Santa: Very long!
• Sardar: Should i buy tickets to my children.
  Conductor: Yes only if they are above 8.
  Sardar: Thank god i have only 6 children
• Santa Singh decided to start a chicken farm so he bought a hundred chickens to begin with. A month later he returned to the dealer for another hundred chickens because all of the first lot had died. A month later he was back at t he dealer for
  another hundred chickens for the second lot had also died. 'But I think I know where I'm going wrong,' said Santa, 'I think I'm planting them too deep.'
• Gang of SARDARS broke a Bank
  Instead of cash they found Botles full of Chilled Red Wine,
  Happily they drank & went away.
  Nxt day Headline:Blood Bank lutya gya.
• Q6. What will! U call a person who is leaving India ??
  Socho....... ........
  Ans:- Hindustan Lever (Leaver).
• in an interview,
  interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
  SARDAR: dhuurrrrrrrrrr..
  Interviewr shouts: stop it !
  SARDAR: dhurr dhup dup dup dup..
• Sardar ji.. Says I Love u to his galfrend.. And suddenly falls on the floor...
  GalFrnd.. What iz this?
  Sarda Ji.. O ji, i'm falling in love )
• Having lost his donkey a Sardarji, got down to his knees and started thanking God. A passerby saw him and asked, "Your donkey is missing; what are you thanking God for ?" The sardarji replied "I am thanking Him for seeing to it had I wasn't riding the donkey at that time, otherwise I would have been missing too.
• Sardar ji is buying a TV
  "Do you have color TVs?"
  "Sure."
  "Give me a green one, please."
• Ek Sardar ne ek bachy se pucha k tum ko A,B,C Aaty hai to bachy ne keha k mujy 9 tak aty hia..
  Sardar ne bachy se keha k oyee Ullu k pathy 9 A,b,c main nahe aata. yeh to Alif,, Be,,Main ata hai:)
• Sardarji proposes to a woman. She says yes if you bring me a pair of crocodile boots. He sets off to Africa and disappears. Finally a search is being made, they find him hunting crocodiles and watch him killing a huge one. He walks over the reptile, checks its legs and angrily exclaims "71st and *again* barefoot!"
• Fifteen minutes into the flight from Mankuwa City to Sukhpur city, the captain announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, one of our engines has failed.. There is nothing to worry about. Our flight will take an hour longer than scheduled, but we still have three engines left." Thirty minutes later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and the flight will take an additional two hours. But don't worry ... we can fly just fine on two engines." An hour later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and our arrival will be delayed another three hours.But don't worry ... we still have one engine left." A sardarji passenger turned to the man in the next seat and remarked, "If we lose one more engine, we'll be up here all day!"
• Why do Sardars work seven days a week? So you don't have to re-train them on Monday.
• Santa and his two friends are talking at a bar. His first friend says, "I think my wife is having an affair with the electrician. The other day I came home and found wire cutters under our bed and they weren't mine."
  His second friend says, "I think my wife is having an affair with the plumber, the other day I found a wrench under the bed and it wasn't mine."
  Santa says, "I think my wife is having an affair with a horse." Both his friends look at him with utter disbelief. "No I'm serious. The other day I came home and found a jockey under our bed."

Sardar found the answer to the most difficult question ever.
What will come first, chicken or egg?
O Yaar, what ever u order first will come first.



Sardarji was standing in front of the mirror with
his eyes closed.
His wife asked what you are doing ?
He said-im seeing how i look while sleeping.



Sardar: should I buy tickets to my children.
Conductor: yes only if they are above 8.
Sardar: Thank god I have only 6 children.


Sardar on an interview 4 da post detective.
Interviewer : who killed Gandhi?
Sardar : Thank u sir 4 giving me d job, I will start investigating. ......


A Sardar was flying a helicopter(!!)
After sometime it crashed… (Obviously!!)
Somehow the Sardar managed to land safely on the ground…
When asked about the reason for the crash, he answered matter of factly, “It was getting very cold up there….. So I switched off the fan!!!”



sardar. to his friend:yaar bari mushkil main hoon mairi Bivi mujh say aik kiss ka RS.100 laiti hay
friend.Acha,yaar to baara lucky hay dosron sey woh 500aiti hai sadif



ardar: Prito "Ek wari I LOVE YOU keh day" Prito: "Nahi Sharam Andi Ey" Sardar: "Keh Day NA" Prito: "Nahi Na" Sardar: "Dhake To Fir Meri Bahen Nahi"



SLAM BOOK filled by Santa.
1.Strength:My wife,Jeeto.
2.Weakness:Banta' s wife,Preeto.
3.Oppurtunity: When Banta is on tour.
4.Threat:When I am on tour



After returning from a foreign trip, sardar asked his wife - Do I look like a foreigner?
Wife: No! Why?
Sardar: In London a lady asked me “are you a foreigner?”



Sardarji was filling up application form for a job. He was not sure as to what to be filled in column “Salary Expected”.
After much thought he wrote: Yes



2 sardars are driving a Car, one puts on the indicator and asks the
other to check whether its working, he puts his head out and says
YES...NO...YES. ..NO...YES. ..NO...



Boss: Where were you born?
Sardar : Punjab ..
Boss : which part ?
Sardar : Kya which part ? Whole body born in Punjab .


How do you recognize a Sardar in School?
He is the one who erases the notes from
the book when the teacher erases the board.
Teacher to Sardar ” Where were U born?
Sardar : In Tiruvanantapuram.
Teacher : Spell it?
Sardar : (after thinking) I think I was born in GOA.