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Short SMS Jokes

  • Q. Where do you find a one legged dog?
    A. Where you left it.

  • What side of an apple is the left side?
    The side that hasn't been eaten.

  • Which candle burns longer, a yellow one or a red one?
    Neither. They both burn shorter.

  • Wo khon si cheez hai jis ko agar zameen pe painko to nahi tootti,
    lekin agar pani mein painko to toot jati hai.:->

    Ans is."ReflEctiOn"

  • Good FRIENDS are hard to find,
    harder to leave,
    and impossible to forget.

  • PHILOSOPHY : small things hurt a lot
    Example : u can sit on a mountain but not on a pin...

  • Ek bandar ka bacha apni maan say:
    maa main itna badsurat kyon hoon

    maa: beta khuda ka shukar karo aur,
    usay dheko jo message pardh raha hai

  • CNN News. Bush orders 15,000 FBI trained dogs to track down Osama. FBI awaiting further orders as one of the dogs is reading this

  • Aa dil.e. Bulbul to kis sa shakh par ja bathi. . . . . . . Na ghar apne na bag apne to kis se dil laga bathi.

  • Full form of MATHS!
    Ans : Mentally Affected Teacher Harassing Students!

  • Man : my wife is too good.
    She can talk on any subject for hours.

    Friend : Ahh!!! My wife is better,
    She does not even need a subject to talk about.

  • Musharraf said to his mother. Ammi mari B.V , M.M.A walon sey meli hoi hai! Jab bhe kamray main jata hoon kehti hai wardi utaro.

  • Ques : Why do Couples hold hands on Wedding Day?
    Ans : Just for Formality, like 2 Boxers shaking hands before Fight!!

  • in chemistry class teacher asked a girl:what r Nitrates?Girl answered shyly:nights rates r high then day ..!

  • Why women love gold more than men? Because gold has 24 carrot whereas man has only one carrot.

  • class me teacher lacture de raha tha, bachon ne dekha us ki zip khuli hui hai, bachay hansne lagay,
    Teacher: kyun hans rahe ho, ab agar hansay ko bahir nikaal ke khara ker dunga.

  • Time is a marvellous healer but is a complete failure as a beautician.

  • I am a killer,I kill people for money.....But because you are my friend,I'll kill you for nothing!

  • Roses are red, violets are blue, Monkeys like you, are kept in Zoo.

  • u r a donkey..... d 4 decent .. o 4 outclass .. n 4 nice .. k 4 kind .. e 4 excelent .. y 4 young.

  • We cannot grant you a life insurance policy because you are already 102 years old. "I do not understand. It is proven statistically that at that age only few people die.

  • If you have a picture where you look old, keep them. In twenty years you can prove that you have not changed a bit.

  • The more i learn the more i get to know, The more i know, so why should i be learning????
  • Nothing in world with out is everything.

  • I've got the ship, you've got the harbor ... what say we tie up for the night?

  • The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents, and the second half by our children.

  • I heard you took an IQ test and they said you're results were negative.

  • Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off NOW!

  • FRIEND SEARCH: Friend detector activated...calibration complete, now searching.....still searching....still searching......sorry, no friends found.

  • Always remember you're unique - just like everyone else.

  • Gorgeous, intelligent, kind, sweet, charming, witty, hilarious, friendly...well enough about ME! How are you?

  • Never miss a good chance to shut up

  • Where there's a will, I want to be in it

  • No guts, no glory, no brain, same story.

  • I"m not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.

  • Is it time for your medication or mine?

  • Pleas turn your mobile phone upside down now!!! Hurry 370HSSV 0773H

  • Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

  • Please, Lord, let me prove that winning the lottery won't spoil me.

  • If practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, why practice?

  • Remember: Don't Insult the Alligator till after you cross the river.

  • Is somebody not editing what I'm saying here???

  • Wo khon si cheez hai jis ko agar zameen pe painko to nahi tootti,lekin agar pani mein painko to toot jati hai.:-> Ans is."ReflEctiOn"

  • Good FRIENDS are hard to find,harder to leave,and impossible to forget.

  • Yun meray khat ka jawab aaya…Lifafay main aik gulaab aaya

  • Ek bandar ka bacha apni maan say:maa main itna badsurat kyon hoon
    maa: beta khuda ka shukar karo aur,usay dheko jo message pardh raha hai

  • Always forgive your enemies;nothing else annoys them so much.
    Oscar Wilde

  • Thought of the day: Agar aap bus pe chade… ya phir bus aap pe chade… dono marthaba ticket aapka hi kat tha hai.

  • Main chahoon Tumhe Tum Chaho Kisi Aur ko,Tum Chaho Jise Khuda Kare woh Chahe Kisi Aur ko.

  • Zindagi mauhtaj nahi manzilon ki waqt har manzil dikha deta hai,Kaun marta hai kisi ke liye waqt sabko jeena sikha deta hai.

  • Mobile X: push 1 for oral, 2 for anal, 3 for normal, 4 for a trio, 5 for SM and for everything ..... dial my number.


  1. ha ha cool jokes. I was looking for the PHILOSOPHY one everywhere. thanks for sharing

  2. Really funny i must say! Lol.

  3. <3 te asshole 1 hehe


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