Nature gives you the face you have at twenty, but it's up to you to merit the face you have at fifty.”- Coco Chanel
he only way to relieve the frustration of being fifty-something is to constantly seek new ways of irritating the young. Fortunately in old age, you develop the ability to do this naturally in every single thing you do or say.
Forty is the old age of youth, fifty is the youth of old age. -Victor Hugo
The years between fifty and seventy are the hardest. You are always being asked to do things, and yet you are not decrepit enough to turn them down. - T. S. Eliot
At fifty you’ve accumulated the knowledge and wisdom of half a century. This would be a tremendous asset if only darned senility hadn’t wiped your memory bank.
You know you’ve lost all creditability with your children when they start to buy you socks and slippers for your birthday.
“I have enjoyed greatly the second blooming… suddenly you find - at the age of 50, say - that a whole new life has opened before you.”
“Nature gives you the face you have at twenty, but it’s up to you to merit the face you have at fifty. ”
“50 years: here’s a time when you have to separate yourself from what other people expect of you, and do what you love. Because if you find yourself 50 years old and you aren’t doing what you love, then what’s the point?”- Jim Carrey
There are three hundred and sixty-four days when you might get un-birthday presents and only one for birthday presents, you know.
To me, old age is always 20 years older than I am.
She was a handsome woman of forty-five and would remain so for many years. - Anita Brookner
A cute fiftieth birthday wish: Happy 20th anniversary of your 30th Birthday.
At twenty you have many desires which hide the truth, but beyond forty there are only real and fragile truths --your abilities and your failings.
You've entered your 70th decadeBut you look good all the sameWho cares if your hair is thin and greyAnd you'll suit a Zimmer frame
You've outgrown my lap, but not my heartO (Maureen) daughter of mineGrowing up's for trees, so why not stayForever 49
Forty isn't old...If you're a tree !
Happy Birthday,you young sapling you
Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris. When Chuck Norris was born, the only person who cried was the doctor. Never slap Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. Ever. Some kids piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete. Chuck Norris used to beat the shit out of his shadow because it was following to close. It now stands a safe 30 feet behind him. Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death. He wins fair and square. There is no Life or Death, only Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicking you in the face. Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield. Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eye...
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