one line jokes

• Mental backup in progress - Do Not Disturb!

• 24 hours in a day ... 24 beers in a case ...coincidence?

• I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol

• if con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

• Chiti chadi pahad pe marne ke waaste,
  doosri taraf se utar gayi.

• "Tum apne pati ko divorce kyo nahi deti"
  "Kya, main apne pati ke saath dus saalo se reh rahi hoo aur tu chahte ho ki main ab use khushi doo.

• There's one thing good about being poor - its inexpensive.

• Why are men like cars?
  Because they always pull out before they check to see if anyone else is cumming.

• "Room Service? Can you send up a towel?"
  "Please wait someone else is using it."

• "Where did you get those sweet eyes?"
  "They came with the face."

• "Tumne apne pati ko chair se kyo mara"
  "Kyon ki main table nahi utha sakti"

• Your future depends on your dreams - So go to sleep!

• I heard you have a dog that can say her own name.
  Yes. bho bho.

• What bone will a dog never eat? A trombone.

• Boys are like parking spaces the good ones are take-in!!!!

• What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?
  el-if-i-no

• I believe we should all pay our tax with a smile. I tried - but they wanted cash

• Don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent

• Cute, charming, funny, good personality, friendly, famous, talanted. That's enought about me. How R U?

• How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
  His lips are moving.

• What is the noisiest thing in the world?
  Two skeletons screwing on a tin roof.

• why dont little girls fart
  A) they don't gat an ass til marriage